Grief is an adaptive process that we all go through at one time or another to ease the pain of losing a loved one. Although scientists have defined phases or stages of grief, each individual experiences the grieving process differently. Crematorium Montreal takes a look at the colours of grief, their meaning and their history.

At a funeral, we wear black

For many centuries, it has been customary to wear dark clothing to a funeral. This western tradition, to indicate to those around us and to the local population that we are in mourning, dates back to the 15th century. We also find some traces of its history long before that in Ancient Rome, where magistrates mourned their predecessor when they took office. For many centuries, the culture of grieving required the widow to “remain in mourning” (a tradition with several rules to follow, including the wearing of black clothes) for 2 years.

A colour associated with death, black is also associated with the earth, the underground, darkness, or the devil and sin according to the Bible. Black represents the darkness, night sleep, the absence of sun under the earth, completely opposite to the light.

Mourning in the world

While the Western world has adopted black to represent mourning, many other countries have preferred to associate it with bright and cheerful colours. In India and Japan, it is customary to wear white for funerals, symbolizing the purity of the soul, light and eternal rest. In China, red is associated with mourning and sometimes even pink, which symbolizes a joyful celebration if the deceased was very old—a sign of a long life. For Iranians, blue is the dominant colour, synonymous with eternal peace. Purple in its full spectrum, from lavender to mauve, is the liturgical colour of the Mass of the Dead and it formed an integral part of the mourning tradition for men in the 15th century. Today, black, grey, white, navy blue, dark green and dark mauve are all colours that we frequently find at funerals.

Flowers, the opposite of clothes
Traditionally, white or mauve flowers are chosen to celebrate the departure of a loved one—the perfect colours for mourning. White is symbolic of spirituality, peace, consolation and the passage from night to light. In contrast to the white flower, the purple flower evokes sadness and melancholy. Soft and nostalgic, pastel-coloured flowers are also ideal for funerals, and are often chosen to express bonds of friendship.

In short, black is never a requirement for a burial or funeral. Even though it symbolizes a universal mark of respect, it is all the more important to respect the choices, customs and traditions of the deceased and the family. More and more people prefer to celebrate the death of their loved one in a different way, without following the traditions of their ancestors step by step.